I got gaps.

“She’s got gaps. I got gaps. Together we fill gaps.” – Rocky (1976)

I love to think about restoration.

One of the most personally inspiring portions of Scripture is the passage in Isaiah 58 about being called “the repairer of the breach, the restorer of streets to dwell in.” A frequent theme in my writing and prayers is the hope that one day, He will make all things new. Stories of redemption inspire me and fill me with life.

But I’m not good at repairing things. When a device stops working, I usually ask someone else for help. When something weighs on my soul, I look for someone with insight to help me shoulder it. I can’t fill my own gaps.

There are times, particularly in relationships, when you see a breach open and swear you won’t let the ship go down without putting up a fight.

You give it your best shot and the ship still sinks. Maybe it isn’t a shipwreck, just the end of a voyage. But maybe it’s the Titanic.

Maybe all you know to say is “You give and take away. Blessed be Your name.”

I know that kind of gap. Outlines that will never be filled in as they once were. You lose something precious and it seems that no one could possibly know the depth of the gap it left behind. You’re alone with a break you can’t fix.

And yet, who knows the depth of the gap more completely than the One who gives and takes away? In those worst of times, there is no greater comfort than the knowledge that He does know and does provide — fully. You don’t always get what you want, but you get what you need to make you more like Christ.

What’s more, He doesn’t just fill our gaps, but He uses us — broken and flawed as we are — to fill gaps for others; to meet others’ needs, often without knowing it. As we embrace a lifestyle of giving, we make ourselves available to fill gaps and, in turn, find ours filled. It’s not a simple process. The more you love, the more you become vulnerable to loss. You’ll get emptied out.

But empty hands are the ones ready to be filled.

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “I got gaps.

  1. Heart echoes these words, Noelle. Oh…*opens mouth to speak but falls to silence again.*

    “The more you love, the more you become vulnerable to loss. You’ll get emptied out.
    But empty hands are the ones ready to be filled.”

    Something within wants to cry. But I find girl heart leaning on Abba heart.
    Restoration comes even in emptiness.

  2. “You don’t always get what you want, but you get what you need to make you more like Christ.”

    So true. God gave me a gap recently that I could not have seen coming, but that I can already see how He might be using to mold me more into the image of His Son. Sometimes, we need gaps to see how incomplete we are, and how fragile even our best laid plans can be.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s